Endings and Beginnings...

It is August 27, 2009. I have officially been done with my masters degree for one week. Its hard to believe that I have already lived in Edinburgh for almost one year. One year seems like a long time when it starts, but when I look back, it has gone in the blink of an eye. And now that the stress has lifted from the back of my mind, I now realize just HOW stressful the past few months have been.

This year was both harder and easier than the last few years that I spent in America. Harder in that, obviously, I have been 8,000 miles away from family, and friends, and the random comforts and pieces of normalcy that one never consciously thinks about until they are taken away. Also harder in that I was thrown into a full research programme that is not designed to cater to anthropology, instead it catered to other social sciences within the school of Social and Political Studies...Sociology, mostly. So there we were (I say "we" because without a few choice friends in my programme, all three of us might have fallen apart) forced to take classes that were unnecessary, expected to write and work without focus, and learning more about the limits of our own sanity than about new trends or research within our own academic field. Hmmm. Sad, in that there is so much we COULD have learned, but happy in that the degree really is SO MUCH shorter here when all of the classes and the bottle-fed research skills are removed. in essence, we taught ourselves, and each other, and learned a lot more about ourselves as friends, researchers, and people than we might have in any other situation.

Celebratory post-degree "feast" in the gardens

The Glamthropologists: Siobhan, Lucy, and Kim

This year was easier in that I found the research process easy to fall into, as it resembled my undergraduate degree quite closely. Once you fall into the rhythm of research, you are using the same format over and over, just plugging in new data. how unglamorous does that sound? but its true. also easier in that i didn't work while attending school. this has, in effect, made me quite lazy, and I'm honestly not looking forward to getting back into the swing of things in the working world...ah well, c'est la vie!

the weather has been crap this summer-very rainy, and warm (for here) meaning that I feel like I live in a rainforest. Its humid. If not for the cool winds, I would be pining for A/C everyday. the weather is also quite schizophrenic. it will rain for 30 minutes, stop, the sky will clear and it will get very warm...then the clouds roll back in and the entire thing repeats in various patterns. I'm hoping September will be better for the family visit :-)

Edinburgh 11:30 pm

I started reviewing theatre for the Edinburgh Fringe Festival the day I turned my dissertation in. Since then I have been viewing 1-3 plays a day, reviewing them for publishing on the website www.playstosee.com. It isn't up and running yet, but will be very soon, so you can check it out if you fancy seeing my opinions on random performances. haha. THe festival itself is fascinating...the streets in old and new town are choked with tourists...French, Spanish, American, English...babbling and gawking and overall blocking traffic and slowing the flow of people on the sidewalks...and none of them understand our streets...although that makes sense, seeing as many streets here have different names for different sections of the street. Confusing, yes. There are kids flyering everything...and everyone for the hundreds of plays, concerts, comedy shows, street performers, and restaurants. Edinburgh in August is definitely a dream for the professional tourist and a somewhat nightmarish, yet necessary experience for the locals.

View of the crowds up the Royal Mile

Street performer

The next few months will bring a lot of change-more change to add to this already interesting year. For two weeks in September I will play tour guide for my parents, brother, and Aunt Peggy. We'll hang out in E-burgh, then head to the highlands for five days. Then, my good friend Adam will be moving to London, and Yara, another good friend, will return from summer in the Med and move into my flat. October will bring the send-off of my wonderful anthro ladies for their respective stints of fieldwork. Lucy is off to Kenya, and Siobhan is off to Poland. It will definitely be strange to not have three of my best friends here next year-but luckily, Skype is amazing, and London and Poland are quite close. And Kenya? well, I most definitely plan on taking a safari within Lucy's year abroad.

Soon, I'll seriously start the job hunt as well. Not a lot available right now, but I'm not too fussed about finding the perfect job right away. I'll also do a bit of searching for PhD funding, just to keep my options open...you never know what the NEXT year will bring!

At least I still love this city...thats always a good sign! You can always see something new when you walk...different routes, different times of day or night...different shadows and quirks. If I keep my eyes open, I doubt I'll ever bore of this city. It isn't the culture capital of Scotland, or the home of so many inspired writers for nothing!

In the words of Alexander McCall Smith: "This is a city of shifting light, of changing skies, of sudden vistas. A city so beautiful it breaks the heart again and again." (on the side of a building in new town)


Here's to the end of life as a matriculated student, and the beginning of life as a student of the world. Take a deep breath-time to dive in!

Lucy, Me, Adam, Alicia on Adam's Birthday

25 years old...and still a poser!
<3

Midsummer Madness

May completely gone...and June almost over already. I literally have no idea how this happened. Well, ok, I do know...Time has been flying past me in a roaring blaze of trips, presentations,thesis writing, new flatmates, new opportunities, emotional ups and downs, parties, and planning for the future.

And thats all on top of normal life things.

whew.

After presenting my proposed research for the entire Social Anthropology department in May, I was able to really get going on writing the bloody thing up. 15,000 words of proposed research (that I am most probably never going to do) due August 21. Its a bit hard to get motivated when you know that the project will never come to fruition. Needless to say, I can't wait for August 22nd! :-) I'm liking the process more now that I'm actually doing the writing, much more enjoyable than the research part itself.

The end of May brought sunny skies and warm weather to Edinburgh! (By "warm", I mean like high 60's low 70's) We took advantage of this by spending as much time as possible outside while it lasted. Picnics in the parks, runs, etc. Sadly, it has been rainy and overcast for the past few weeks...and warm. Bit hard to plan for outfits. HAHA.

Lucy and I in the Meadows for a picnic...Notice the SUN shining on us!

May switched over to June with a trip to Berlin with Darleen. Neither of us had visited there before, and it was a really amazing city. Full of open streets and Huge architecture, like the Reichstag and Berlinerdom. Because of the bombings during WWII, Berlin was largely flattened except for major architecture, which is why the streets are so much wider and open than other cities in Europe. It felt much more American than European, walking down streets that wide and spaces so open in front of Monuments that dwarf everything around them and make you feel like an ant. Very intimidating, but also awe-inspiring. And CLEAN! Score one for German efficiency and cleanliness!

Reichtag

Berliner Tor (Gate)

Berlinerdom

outside the Contemporary Art museum...insanely large building!

At the Holocaust Memorial...really symbolically impressive

Checkpoint Charlie-the separation between East and West Berlin. Now its a jarring contradiction of the past and present

Jewish Museum...Les Fuilles Mortes (the dead leaves) represent the victims of the Holocaust

They had bears dressed in different things all over the city...I liked Kaffe Bear!


It was a really nice trip! And a bit of the last hoorah for KimDar's year abroad...Dar left two weeks later to go back to California for the remainder of her Master's. But first, Our friends James and Justin came over to London to visit. I took the train down for a few days and visited...there was a tube strike that week...VERY frustrating! The bus takes HOURS to get anywhere, traffic is worse than death, and London is TOO big to get anywhere on foot. But we made the most of it, and had a lot of fun! the last night there was a going away party for Darleen, which was great!

Justin, Me, Dar, Adam, and James

Since getting back from London, I've been in Thesis mode to the max! I'm 8,000 words in, and I have to have my first draft in by mid-July. I've been working a lot from home, which is both good and bad. Its good because I can wear pajamas all day, but bad when my flatmates get home! My friend Yara moved in with us for the month of June, before leaving for her summer placement in Cyprus. The combination of Yara, Adam and I is quite the circus. We egg each other on and end up in hysterics, doing yoga in the hallway and end up having serious conversations until 2-3 am. This is definitely the most fun I've ever had with roommates.

I have also been offered a position at a new website that does theatre reviews for people in my generation. It isn't paid right now, but potentially could turn into a job in the future. For now, I get into plays and the opera for free in Edinburgh, and I'll have my reviews published on the website! Very exciting, and good for my CV! PLus, Edinburgh in August is literally one long unending festival, with hundreds of plays and performances to see! So I literally won't sleep all of August, but it will SO be worth it!

Note: Midsummer was the longest of the long days of sunlight...Edinburgh by summer= Sunlight from 3 am to 11 pm...with the sky only really being completely dark from midnight to 2:30 am...so crazy!

Since Yara is leaving for two months, we took advantage of an excuse for a party and threw a surprise Birthday/going away for her last night. It was Mexican themed, and hilarious! Adam and I go all out for party themes...so we made sure to do it properly! Yes, I even dyed my hair for the occasion! (not permanent!)


Fiesta Arrrriba!

Mi amiga Yarita!

Yara, Alicia, and I

Overall I'm taking stock and attempting to plan the future as much as I can from where I am-can't look for a job until I finish my thesis, and can't apply for my work visa until I graduate. I'm not sure what the next few months will bring, but I'll be fine! I've got great friends and family, and I appreciate each and every one of you!

<3

All Over Spring Like White on Rice...

Wow, I just realized that I haven't written for two months...two months that have been jam-packed with a LOT of random people, places, and events.

March went out in a whirlwind of birthday related fun...I threw myself a Tapas party here in my flat, with a lot of good friends from my University programme, my Mediterranean friends, and even my friend from home who lives in Switzerland came up for the weekend to join in on the festivities. It was a nice day, a little bit weird to turn 25, but I've grown to accept my status as part of the "Quarter Century Club".
Adam and I on my Birthday
Alicia, Sophie, Adam, Me, and Chris

Went to California and Washington for about 17 days at the end of March/Early April. It was nice weather, and even nicer to see everyone I got to see, although there never seems to be enough time to see everyone, do everything you want to do, and still find time to relax (I definitely missed out on the relaxation part the most). I'll be back though, so if I didn't get to see you this time, I'll definitely make sure to see you in a few months!
Mi Familia

Recently, the University sent the Anthro postgraduates to the highland for a 4 day workshop preparing us for fieldwork. It was an interesting week, we met a lot of crazy anthropologists (apparently in Edinburgh we are the LEAST crazy of the anthro students throughout Scotland). After that, I recently presented my thesis to the entire department here in Edinburgh. It went really well, now that I HAVE a project! HAHA! In the UK there is no "general education" requirement for public speaking or anything, so I had the upper hand by having past experience in doing presentations and taking a public speaking course.
The town of Kinloch Rannoch (Anthro workshop)

I've been spending a lot of time working on my Master's thesis and trying to figure out what I'm going to be doing in the upcoming years. I have decided to defer my entry into the PhD after this year for two reasons: one, I have no funding, and there is no WAY I am going to self-fund the entire degree and research. Two, I need to do some serious thinking to decide if I actually want to undertake the PhD. One thing I have learned this year is that the PhD process is, itself, a rite of passage that is intense, very difficult, and seems to be set up as a hurdle for those who might want to go on and be real Anthropologists in the future. AS of now, I am very much interested in my research topic, but not quite sure I need to be bothered with the entire PhD process (some of you know how I feel about being forced to jump unnecessary hurdles put in place by institutions).

I have two options for next year now: One, I can work here while I decide what I want to do. Two, I have been accepted into the Creative Writing Master's degree here in Edinburgh. This would be an intensive writing course, and it is apparently quite hard to get accepted into the programme, so I am definitely thinking long and hard about which direction I want to go in next year.

My Master's research/PhD research Proposal has finally been settled on after months of reading, reflecting, and meeting with my amazing (new) supervisor. I am looking at the Hindu migrant community within the UK, specifically Scotland; and how they are attempting to create a unified, cohesive Hindu community and identity within the UK despite the fact that within India there is no cohesive, unified "Hindu" identity. Hinduism is a broad, varied, and highly differentiated culture and religion. The fact that Hindu migrants are consciously attempting to unify themselves in an effort to differentiate themselves from other South Asian migrants in the UK through self-consolidation is a fascinating social process. I want to look at how food (a very important Hindu cultural tool) is used to bring the community together and reify the Hindu communal identity. Also, I plan to look at how the use of certain Hindu food traditions and the disuse of certain food traditions from India is used as a political tool within the community to create dominance and to uphold social and economic differentiation between members of the community. (Remember, in Hinduism, certain people can't eat with other castes or social groups, certain people are vegetarian, some can't serve others because they are "polluted", everyone prepares food in regionally and socioeconomically specific ways, etc.)

more on that in upcoming months...

I am still really loving my life here. I live with an amazing friend, Adam, who is a wonderful person to have around-full of energy and life and always up for anything, but also really focused on the future and passionate about doing what he can to help others. Starting in September, I will be living with my friend Yara, a Law student from Lebanon who is one of the smartest people I have ever met, and who has the most potential to have an impact on the world of anyone I have ever met. She will be moving into the flat here that I live in, as Adam is planning to move away from Edinburgh for a while.

The weather continues to play with my emotions...I have definitely adapted to the cold, enjoying the "warm" days when it gets up into the high 50's and I can walk around in light clothing. (Sad, but true). Unfortunately, Mother Nature thinks it fitting to bless Edinburgh with three to five days of sunlight and warmth, then proceed to throw five days of overcast, rain, and snarling wind in our direction. This is definitely a place where you are well-advised to check the weather report every morning before leaving the house!

This summer is going to see me traveling quite a bit (fingers crossed). At the end of May, Darleen and I are going to visit Berlin for a few days. Neither of us have been there, ant it is supposed to be a fabulous city to visit. In early June, I'm heading down to London to meet up with my friends who are coming over from California for a week. After that, Adam and I are in the process of planning a trip to Turkey and Israel (or perhaps Israel and Jordan, where we have a mutual friend) the plan changes on a daily basis, but think Israel is definitely going to be in the mix. I'm really excited to go to some new places, and especially someplace in a part of the world I have never visited!

Caught up in Hurricane Life

So much has happened in the past two weeks...The last time I wrote feels like so much longer than almost two weeks...

The last day I updated was also the day that catalyzed the following 12 days of madness that brings me to today...sitting home at midnight on a Saturday because I'm so exhausted and came home straight after the birthday dinner I attended earlier.

Anywho, that fateful Monday: A girl in my kitchen asked me if I was interested in having a girl come see my room who was interested in moving into our building. My answer? "Hell YES!" I have been trying to get out of my contract there for two months...this seemed like a lucky break that someone actually would WANT to move in!

So the girl came, she saw, she liked, and she told me she would let me know her decision the next day.

Tuesday: My friend Adam texts me asking if I can get out of my contract because one of his flatmates wants to move out. Oh, the coincidence! My answer? "Actually, I probably can get out, I'll let you know". (Adam happens to have a GREAT flat...good sized rooms, great kitchen and living room, cheaper than the Res...and only three people all together!) Later, the girl tells me she wants my room! YAY!

Wednesday: The girl and I do the paperwork to transfer her into my room. Only issue? She needs the room by Monday, So I have to get on it and pack my stuff and find a place to live ASAP!

Thursday/Friday/Saturday: Pack...pack more...be happy that I'm leaving...neglect homework a LOT...attend a Dinner party my good friend hosts for a bunch of us...pack MORE (turns out I have a LOT of crap here)

Sunday: MOVING DAY! Adam and his Mom came in two cars, loaded up my ridiculous amount of stuff, and moved me over...Because the roommate who is leaving has yet to vacate the premises (she's nuts, and doesn't communicate well) I'm staying in Adam's room, and he is staying at his parent's home in Bathgate (30 minutes away). Yeah, he's kind of an amazingly generous friend. I need to bake him and his family a "thank you" cake...

Monday/Tuesday/Wednesday: get settled in as much as possible when I can't really unpack, learn to walking route to school (now a 30 minutes walk each way...nice though, and good exercise) the local grocery store, the ways of the flat, etc. I also completely cleaned and reorganized the kitchen and all cupboards and fridge/freezer...No worries, the two guys I live with seem to find my obsessive need to clean and have things organized as somewhat endearing, or maybe just as entertaining...

Thursday: Adam and I had a few people over for a vegetarian dinner. Made Eggplant stuffed with fruit couscous topped with Halloumi, roasted veggies, and vanilla ice cream toped with homemade plum compote (a new fave of mine)...I have now done little to no homework for like two weeks...need to get on that!

Friday: Sushi night for Alicia's B-day...James made homemade sushi! Yum! Also, Eamon's brother plus six other guys arrived from Ireland today for the Ireland v. Scotland Rugby game tomorrow...That's a lot of loud, sporty Irish people in one flat...

Today: The Irish guys gave me flowers and chocolate as a thank you for putting up with them this weekend! So sweet!

My Flowers

Dinner was again for Alicia's actual birthday...and I think I'm getting sick...I also planned my birthday "party" today...Appetizers, drinks, dessert, then we'll head out to a pub or two...I can't believe I'm turning 25...WEIRD!

Thing's won't be slowing down soon either...Next week I need to catch up on some work, get stuff together for the party, and start getting things together for my trip to Cali! I can't WAIT to come home for a bit! :-)

I'll post some flat pics when I actually move into my new room and there isn't luggage from a bunch of visitors all over the place!

<3

Back to Reality...

I arrived home this morning at 2 am from our weekend trip to the Highands. No internet, no cell (well, I just chose not to use my cell), no manic city/uni/life in general events constantly overwhelming me. Just great food, great friends, AMAZING scenery, and a change of pace that was severely needed.

Adam's house is in Lochcarron, on the west coast of Scotland right next to the Isle of Skye. The landscape is so beautiful there, it's easy to see where all the great Scottish authors have found inspiration. The mountains are much lower than the ones I'm used to in California, they remind me more of the hills around Simi Valley and the Santa Monica mountains...not too tall, and not too sharp. this part of Scotland wasn't glaciated, and the landscape feels slightly less intimidating compared to the sheer rock faces found in other parts of the island (although none of the British mountains have anything on the Sierra Nevada). There is a melange of complementary life across the mountains-gorse, heather, some evergreens, some deciduous trees, a lot of exposed rock cut through with thousands of streams rushing from the peaks into the loch (lake) below. And a lot of sheep.

While hiking the Culags :-)

There are lochs everywhere. Loch Carron is a sea loch, connecting to the Atlantic/Arctic Oceans, and the Gulf Stream on the west coast of Scotland ensures a temperate environment. It was a little damp, but not overly cold or rainy while we were there. The topography reminded me a lot of the hills around Simi Valley, actually. The deep browns, the exposed rock faces, the sparse tree covering (there has been some deforestation, apparently). The view from Adam's place is amazing. Straight out over the loch to the opposite mountains, the water constantly moving with the breeze, the clouds covering the sky giving a sense of both oppression and safety (depending on you're mood at the time, I guess). The water mirrors the grey sky, but the grey/blue of the water and the sky both magnify the smooth velvet tones of the hills, making you want to reach out and touch them, caress them like the familiar face of a loved one. When random chunks of pure sunlight cut through the clouds, exposing the pure, sapphire hue of the water you receive a small jolt of warmth that cuts straight to your heart. Those small, teasing hints at the potential color the loch hides kept me staring, staring at the scene before me for countless minutes yesterday morning. watching the small changes and the overall strong stability that the Highlands does so well. You literally feel steeped in and awed by the weighty sense of history-both of humanity and nature-that the rugged, soft, safe, sweet, challenging mountains, lochs, and valleys present.




I feel I could wander those mountains, lochs, and valleys for weeks at a time, lost in my own primordial human nature and relying on my sense of wonder and desire to explore and find my own identity reflected back from a loch's depths, hear my laughter welling up from a mountain stream, my strength emanating from the deeply rooted mountains.


The highlands are a magical place, if you open yourself to the possibility of centuries of interactions and contradictions between man and nature. those contradictions and interactions have left faint paths, stirrings of old ideas and new chances to take, if you care enough to stop for a minute and feel for them. I now understand why they are still regarded by so many as such a magical place. I can't wait to go back.

Trip tae th'Hielands!

Oh, we're off to the Highlands, the Highlands, the Highlands!


I'm quite excited! I slept in (8 am is sleeping in? how sad), did a bit of yoga (note to self:DO YOGA MORE OFTEN!), now I'm drinking coffee and romanticizing the upcoming weekend (I have some sort of Wuthering Heights English Moor in my head, but I know it won't look like that...) We're going to Loch Carron...right next to the Isle of Skye (North west coast of Scotland) It's supposed to be very secluded and beautiful, with a Munro (mountain) right in Adam's backyard!

AND I'm NOW in The Beatles place that I was hoping for yesterday! Things are looking up! Yay for mini-breaks and Paul McCartney induced Euphoria!

<3

Soundtrack...

the past 24 hours seem to have been tailor-made to complement a soundtrack comprised completely of songs by Ben Gibbard...


It started with a friend bonding moment that involved waxing poetic about The Postal Service and me pulling out my I-pod to allow my friend to re-discover "Such Great Heights" which she hadn't heard in years...And I was instantly reminiscing over the strong feelings this song brings to the fore of my memory...

"I am thinking it's a sign, that the freckles in our eyes are mirror images and when we kiss they're perfectly aligned..."


Later, I was living a "Lightness" moment in regard to some information I received about a certain guy who has been wreaking havoc with my mind for the past six months. I have the closure I need...I hope he can somehow find his.

"Oh, instincts are misleading, you shouldn't think what you're feeling..."


The entirety of today was wrapped up in "Pity and Fear" and I'm SO GLAD that I get to leave town tomorrow...I need a break, and a chance to both recharge and reassess a LOT of stuff...Its a good thing that there will be no internet or cell service up in Lochcarron because my addiction to the web is definitely getting out of control...

"I have such envy for the stranger lying next to me...with no words, a clean escape, no promises or messes made..."


Now I'm in a "Its only a matter of time before we all burn" mood a la "Grapevine Fires"

I am definitely crashing and burning right now...I feel bad for what type of friend and human I have become in the past few months...I've been selfish and negative and have let myself physically and mentally become the type of person I hate...

Actually, now that I think about it, I'm still in a "pity and Fear" place as well...

"A storm at sea, bow cracked and I was capsizing, I sunk below where I swore I would never go, If you can't stand in place you can't tell who's walking away...who stays, who stays, who stays?"


Hopefully when I come home Sunday night I'll be in a "Brand New Colony" frame of mind thanks to friends and fun (and sleep)!

"I want to take you far from the cynics in this town...start a brand new colony where everything will change...the sun will heat the ground under our bare feet in this brand new colony...everything will change..."

Actually, if I'm hoping for things, I hope I'm in a more "Good Day Sunshine" frame of mind come March...

"I need to laugh, and when the sun is out, I've got something I can laugh about..."


p.s. Dar I love you...thanks for listening to me bitch for the past month...